Most of you have only met the superficial version of me. I’ve been thinking a lot about my personal brand in the recent weeks, and I’ve come to a few major decisions as to how I want people to perceive me. Through my blog, I have complete discrepancy as to how and what I write about myself. Until lately, it’s been completely overdone. For some silly reason, half the people who have heard of me perceive me as a child prodigy. The other half either think I’m arrogant or don’t care. The purpose of this blog post is to tell you that I’m more of the normal teenage girl than you probably think.

Firstly, I don’t deserve the credibility that I have. I’m out there in the tech world and I’m sometimes mentioned on people’s blogs. Big deal! I haven’t sold a successful startup and I don’t have a product that I’ve launched this year. Yet somehow, I get invited to speaking engagements and other fancy elitist groups. Instead, you should see me for and only for my enthusiasm and potential. I’m off to an early start, but in a few years, that won’t matter. Nobody will care in 10 years that I went to college early and failed at a few startups when I was 16 years old. I guess I’m slightly worried that I’ve been spending too much time talking to you guys and not enough time doing something great. Until I find amazing success, none of you should have the right to call me smart.

Next, I much rather you guys view me as a child prodigy than as a whore. Sure, my personal branding has been overdone, but at least it was overdone in a somewhat positive direction. Unlike Paris Hilton, people have a slight clue as to what I want to do with my life. Smarts are sustainable, looks are not. As one of my friends said, “if you’re going to be famous, at least have a business model.” People associate my name to business and technology. As for Paris Hilton, well, people look at her as a hot girl with an empty brain. No matter how hard she tries to change her personal brand, people will be stuck in their old ways of thinking. So, if you overdo your personal branding, “do it with a business model” :)

Internet celebrity Julia Allison wrote on her Tumblr yesterday:

I’m in the midst of a transformation right now. Actually, it’s not so much an internal transformation (although there’s that, too) but a realignment – so my outside matches my inside, so the perception matches the reality.

The quote just comes to show that people don’t understand who she is. They read about her in Valleywag, but they don’t know how fun, enthusiastic, and smart she is in real life. I’ve been told so many times by my blog readers that I’m different from how they thought I’d be. Some thought that I’d be formal, proper, intelligent and well-spoken, whereas others thought I’d be a snotty-arrogant-uptight-child-prodigy-bitch. One reader suggested that I overdid my professional brand, whereas Julia blurred her personal and professional brands together.

In real life, I’m just an adventurous teenager. I like to do something called having fun. I have something called friends. I go to class, I do my homework, I play instruments, I play sports, and do all the things you’d expect a normal 17 year old kid to do. (minus the many fun business/tech trips I’ve been on). Sure, I’m in college, but that doesn’t mean much about my personality. Instead, try to see through the fog: all of the random bloggers you stalk are real human beings and have lives outside of the internet. Their personal brand may be completely deceiving for all you know.

Like many girls, I’ve had that desire to have the spotlight on me. And I’ve gotten quite a lot of spotlight for a girl my age, but I’ve come to realize that it’s nothing more than a distraction. I’m dedicating too much effort to building up my personal brand and not enough in a) leading a normal teenage life and b) working on doing something amazing, whether it be save the world or build a hot startup. As one of my friends Charlie mentioned, the most brilliant people he knows prefer to keep in the shadows. They don’t have much of a personal brand, but their smarts and successes create the true credibility one needs to be known. I guess as of late, this idea has been much more appealing to me.

So what does all of this mean for you, me, and my future in blogging?

1) The blog lives on. I’ll always continue to blog because I love you guys so much!

2) I’ve decided to cut wayy back on my conference going. I have many connections as it stands and I don’t need to waste more time networking with 50 year olds.

3) You hopefully won’t have to see me on Valleywag again. As I’ve mentioned in other posts, the influx of press gives you a temporary high.

4) It’s soo easy to get drawn into the fun culture of Silicon Valley. It’s so easy that you sometimes forget to create something of value.

So for now, I’ll try to stay in the shadows. I have no problem speaking at conferences or doing interviews or whatever, but I’ll remain honest and true to myself: I’m a kid who’s yet to succeed in business.

Jessica Mah is a 17 year old entrepreneur, blogger, and sophomore in college. She’s currently the founder of a startup and the managing editor at Startupism.com, and Jessicamah.com. Big thanks to my friends Jacob Locke, Patricia Handschiegel, and Charlie O’Donnell for having helped me gather my thoughts on this.